Saturday, July 29, 2006

How did you meet your partners?

I've always been curious, fine I'm nosy as all get out.
How did you all meet your husbands, wives, partners or last nights conquest?

I met my husband in a club, of course I did, geesh, where else would they have let him in to keep him from falling down? duh.

Seriously, I was with my friend Michelle, sitting talking, when a drinks came to our table. Then around round, then another. Pretty soon there was about seven drinks each for Michelle and me.
I asked the waitress who was sending all the drinks? And who was gonna drive home, cause if I drank all those, I would not be driving, hell I wouldn't be walking. The waitress points to a table and walks away. I lean around to see who she had pointed too and there was a guy with another girl. WHAT THE HELL? One girl wasn't enough? He wanted a few more? Trust me, that wasn't gonna happen.
The waitress comes back and says "did I mention that is his sister he's with?" And it turned out it was indeed his sister. They lived within walking distance from this club and knew the waitress from the neighborhood. Well he finally came over and sat on my side of the booth, and somehow got my phone number and that was almost 23 years ago.
Pitiful I know, but that is my story. How about all of yours?

Thursday, July 27, 2006


Ok, I have a question for you all.
When our favorite guy from Portland was here for the gay games, he told me that a thunderstorm that morning had woken him up and it was really nice to hear the thunder. Because in Portland they don't have THUNDER. I was surprised but he insisted that nope, they don't have thunder. I thought it thundered everywhere. But maybe I'm wrong. So can anyone tell me...

IS THAT TRUE? Or was I a total sucker in believing that line of bull. lol.

Monday, July 24, 2006 chapters up.

Oh and there are new chapters of Christian and Theron up at Shut my eyes...
I'll put up two more tonight.


Tonight on ABC FAMILY they showed a movie. A really good movie in fact, called FALLEN. Here is my bitch... at the end of the two hour movie, they give us the website and then say "Watch for the six hour television event coming in the summer of 2007. WHAT?!?! why on earth would they show a two hour movie now and then not have a series ready? or move chapters? this is insane to me. By then I'll read the dang books.

The movie was about an adopted boy who on the day of the movie turned 18. He begins to experiance strange things happening to him and around him. He learns he is actually a Nephilim. And there are bounty hunter warriors after him, and any other nephilim they can trackdown and destroy.
A Nephilim is actually a half-angel/half-human. When the fallen angels came to earth they mated with humans and the Nephilim are what they produced. The off-spring of the fallen angels.
There is also a BBC show called HEX that deals with Nephilims as well. But in that case the one Nephilim has concieved a child with a chosen decendent and the child is already born. And upon his birth it released the other two hundred trapped bad nephilims back into the world. Interesting, but it's no CHARMED.

This ABCFAMILY show was tame but interesting. At times a bit on the childish side, with the boy's dog being able to talk to him. He reminded me at times of Duke, the baked beans dog. lol.

Friday, July 21, 2006

Hot Toddy

I finally have met Hot Toddy.


He is truly a sweet, funny and charming man.
And any guy would be lucky to find himself worshipping at Toddy' feet.
I am a huge fan of his blog and of his kind heart and soul.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Call from the grave

Today the phone rang.
Now, that in itself isn't anything amazing.
I answered.
"Hey" the woman with the southern drawl said.
"Hey" I answered.
"Just wanted to let you know we just got here."
"Ok. ... Who is this?" I asked.
"Your MOTHER" the woman laughs.
" have the wrong number."
She laughed, said she was sorry and hung up.

Now, my mother has been dead for ten years. I think she must have gotten to where she was going a long time ago. Funny thing is...this woman DID sound like my mom.
I hung up and my husband asked who was on the phone. "Call from the grave" "She said she was my mom."

Wonder who she 'arrived' with?


Welcome to Chicago, and the heats of Hell.



The Gay Games have arrived, the city is bubbling with athletes and spectators. Hotels are filled, cabs are insane (still? More?) and air cooling centers have been set up all around. Probably not as many as there should be.
Today's temp hit near 100 with a heat index at least 105. And for the next few days it isn't going to be any better. Tomorrow and Monday the heat index will be up around 110. I feel horrible for all the athletes who have trained and waited for these games, only to have to fight the heat along with competition.

Good Luck to everyone.

And Hot Toddy has arrived. He called this morning to ask me to call the Mayors Office to tell them to PLEASE TURN DOWN THE HEAT! I did what I could, but our Mayor has other more important things to do. Like...Digging up plane runways to keep terrorists from attacking Navy Pier or the gold coast. Hmmm, those rich folks don't need protecting, hell they could just bitch and complain the terrorists into surrender.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Max, the cat-fish

Max has discovered the bathtub. Not only does he sit on the side and the ripples, he has taken to jumping in and playing.
Yesterday, I had maybe an inch of water in the tub, tepid not hot, and he jumped right in. I stood and watched him to see what he would do. He walked around, lifting his paws and licking the water off. Then he walked from one end to the other slapping the water with his feet. Very cute. But, aren't cats supposed to NOT like water? Another myth shot down. In fact all the cats we've ever had have liked water. We had a litter a few years ago that their mother had them, and booked, SEE YA! Never saw her again.
I had to bottle feed them, and teach them to eat out of a bowl. Well, you can imagine what a icky mess four kittens would be after eating baby cereal...I taught them to walk into the bathroom after they were finished and wait by the tub. After each meal, they took a bath. They weren't overly happy about it at first, but they went along with it fine. And those cats still play in the water.
My married daughter has one of them and she says he stands in the shower and lays in the sink to catch the water on his tongue.

Strange animals. But, again, they do belong to me.

Hey, I just had a thought...Max is a different color but could he be the dinosaur creature I dreamt about who swam in the tub in the dream I had a while back? hmmm.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Hi ya

Ok, it is five am. I'm trying to find something do besides not sleep. I was watching an old movie with Judd Hirsch WITHOUT A TRACE. I'm assuming this is what the tv show is based on. I was an hour and forty minutes into a two hour movie, when nature decided to let the sky's open up and believe me hell actually has fury like a pissed off mother nature. Cable went kaput, never did see the last twenty minutes of the movie. I'm guessing the little boy was alive, and his mother did get him back, and that the gay guy really didn't have anything to do with it, but perhaps the little boys fathers new girlfriend did. I guess I'll have to see if it ever airs again.

Today, I scraped old old paint off the porch. Must have been on there so long, wood came off with the paint. I can see a trip to Home Depot soon, to buy a new post to hold my porch roof up. Wonder who will come and do this job? Hmm I don't know either.

Then I made mini cupcakes for the coven. I mean 'spirit group' it's my turn to bring treats. Blessed be, ya'all Blessed be.
Jodie, I'm kidding. I swear I haven't joined any cult, or become a wiccan. But, I do really like the capes and the cool hats. You should come to a meeting, I mean 'class' sometime. lol.

I have a new kitty. Will be trying to up load some pics of him soon. He's a little 8 week old solid black ball of crazy. He actually looks like a bat. He has really cool black eyes, and sharp little fangs.
When I brought him home, the dogs gathered round to check out the new house member, said hello and walked away un-impressed. The kitten, who's name is Max, took an instant liking to the old dog with alzhimers. He will sit and stare at the old dog. It's almost like he's chanting. "Oh, ancient one. You are the ancient one." the old dog is loving the attention.

If Max were an ancient roman, his name would be Maximus Kittimus. He really does have an air about him. I'm really digging him.

Thursday, July 06, 2006



Ok, today I was shopping and I was reminded of something I almost did to my kids a bunch of years ago.
In the store today there was a mom with a few younger kids in tow, maybe ten or eleven. She looked haggard and about to snap. The kids kept picking on each other and one kept 'telling' on the others. "Mom, she hit me. Mom, why does she get to get that? why can't I get the ...blah blah blah" you get the picture. The mother was trying to ignore them to no avail. At this point I remembered a similar incident involving me and my two younger ones. They weren't as annoying as these three, but damn close. I kept telling them to stop. They continued to bug me and everyone around me, for another ten or fifteen minutes.
I finally snapped. Though, I didn't yell, nor did I beat them to death the yellow Wal-Mart smiley face. I did calmly remind them of the movie Fame. And told them if they did not cease at that very moment, that I would surely as the sun would rise tomorrow, I would run down the aisle with my arms and head thrown back, stick out my chest, dancing all the all the way, and jumping while I was singing at the top of my lungs...


It was just enough of a shock that they stopped and stared at me like I had three heads. They weren't quite sure if I would do it or not.

And just to prove to them I would have done it, I did too a little run and jump in the parking lot, singing. They were horrified and mortified. I loved it!
It was months before they misbehaved in a store again.

Parents have got to keep these kids on their toes. Keep them guessing what you might do all the time. If they think you are crazy, they won't push you that far.

Paybacks are a bitch.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006


North Korea is testing medium and long range missiles now?

Lovely, just freaking lovely.

Like we didn't have enough stuff hanging over our collective heads already.
And have you ever seen their leader guy, I can't think of his name, but everytime I see him, with his little jumper thing on, he reminds me of somebody and I can't think of who. A cartoon maybe. It will come to me sooner or later. It's late/early and I can't think straight, so forgive my ignorance at not knowing what his name is.

Tuesday, July 04, 2006


Last night, I won ten dollars. I did.

The next town over from ours always has a small 'festival' for the forth of July. It is always held in Firemen's Park, which is separated by a paved parking lot next to…the fire station. Hence, the name Firemen's park. Get it? I was sure you would.

Any how, they have a few booths, the ladies this or that sell raffle tickets for any number of things, the car dealership raffles off a car or truck. And they have a different band each night. There are about ten or twelve lame rides, put together by a rag tag group of carneys I wouldn't let work on anything I valued, but we allow our children to ride dangerous rides that might kill them, built by same said men. Oy.

They also have BINGO. I love bingo, for the record. I went tonight because, let's face it, there isn't any thing else to do around here, so, lets go play fifty cent BINGO.

Sitting next to me were a few ladies, one got up to go and get a soda or something and when she came back, the chair bite her. Ok, you know the chairs I am gonna talk about. The ugly wooden brown ones? The ones that your grandma had stashed away in the garage or basement and only pulled them out for Christmas or Easter dinner? The same ones used in every church basement from Seattle to the Florida Keys. Well, she went to pull it out, and it closed on her finger. HARD. She winced, moaned, held her finger and tried to make due. Finally, she showed it to one of the bingo guys. Who by the way tonight were all public school employees. You could tell too. Our card guy had on white shorts down to his knees with a stripped shirt. Science teacher. You just could tell. The caller: he kept cracking the lamest jokes known to man. PE teacher or maybe math.

Anyhow, the science guy went to look for a band aid. He came back and told her he couldn't find one, but he had called over to the fire house, and they were gonna bring one over. Now, I state again, it is on the other side of the parking lot. They could have walked it over in two minutes. Nope. They came out of the station in the ambulance with lights flashing, and drove over to the bingo tent.
The ladies friends all got up and left. Certain of the humiliation to follow. I started to laugh. "Is this for you?" I pointed at the ambulance coming towards us, and she moaned louder and hung her head in shame.
They pulled up, and started to unload. She couldn't take it any more, jumped up and ran over pointing at her hurt finger. We all were practically in stitches, when she walked back with a band aid on her finger. They loaded up the ambulance and went back across the parking lot.

They must have been bored!

The next game was a free game of bingo. And I won it. TEN whole dollars. I then spent half of it on a raffle ticket for the pickup truck. Boy, that would make my day. A pickup truck with BRICKYARD racing shit on the door.

Man, I would be so envied around here.

Sunday, July 02, 2006


It is 7:50 pm and my husband is cleaning blueberry pie off his hands, and pants. Why, you ask is he doing that? Because...It smeared.

It began awhile ago. He's been an ass all weekend. Hell, he's been an ass for 14 of the past 21 years, but, who's keeping score, besides me and the lawyer. Anyhow, I bought pies to snack on. An apple one and a blueberry one. Patrick and Tom both like blueberry, so that is why it has been sitting on the counter for two days.

I mentioned a little bit ago as I was cleaning up the dinner mess that there was blueberry pie. Tom snapped "it's cherry, not blueberry." I turned and said. "NO, it's blueberry" Tom stopped and nearly screamed at me "BLUEBERRY!!" I picked up the pie to just show him it was blueberry. Honest I did. But, then something in me snapped, maybe it was the way he was standing, maybe it was the permanent snarl planted on his face, maybe it is the fact that I am full of American Indian blood, mixed with pissed off Irish, I don't know. All I do know is that I threw it at him. It hit the garage can, it splashed all over his jeans, funny thing is that it pretty much just hit him. He looked shocked. When he wiped it off his pants and his hand came up blue. All I said was.... BLUEBERRY. And walked away.

I told him it was blueberry.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

Strange things I've seen

I've seen some strange things, and have been seen as well.

Yesterday coming home from an afternoon class with my spirit teacher there was a red Rhode island red chicken just walking down the side of the road.
There is no joke about why the chicken crossed the road. She already was across and leaving town.
I have no idea where she was coming from or going. But, she seemed to be moving at a good clip, she must have had someplace important to be today.

And this morning, my new neighbors saw me in my underwear. Now, that is something NO one needs to see, let alone the neighbors with the horses. You already know my take on people who own and show horses, so, I was shocked, but not as shocked as she was.

My two black labs have gotten into the habit of going out around midnight, or one and not coming home till six or seven in the morning. I've had to walk down the half mile in the morning to bring them back home. They either are walking through the sub division or just running, playing in the horse peoples yard. I'm terrified they will cause some damage and try not to let them out together. For some reason if they are separated, they don't run. The antisocial dog just is nuts, and I do think he's gonna have to go, or I'm next in line for the dog whisperer.

This morning, while I was still in bed, I heard them all barking. The bark that says..."We're eating the garbage man, you don't mind do you?" I jumped up and ran to the door. Never expecting to come face to face with our neighbor. She was as surprised as I was to see I was in my tee shirt and undies. I tried to slide out to the side of the door, but it didn't work well.
She was coming to tell me that she had come home to find my dogs stealing her downspout off her gutters. This is the second time she said that they've stolen them. Why? I have no freakin idea. I haven't seen them around anyplace.
I did have some weird black rubber box thing, that I sent Megan down with on her way into town, to see if that was hers? Nope, no here's, and it turned out to be a rat trap. I have no idea now where they have stolen that from. Geesh.
She said, they have lots of rabbits, which obviously the dogs chase, and the bunnies run up into the black gutter things to hide, and the dog just pulls them off. I guess I'm gonna have to go out and look in the field to see if I can find pieces of the neighborhood that my klepto dogs have stolen.

This is the same dog who holds the old neighbors hostage. But, I'm still holding out that someday, they will be found out to be terrorists and my dog was the only one who knew. He will be a hero. Really, he is. A hero perhaps that steals everything he can get his sticky little paws on though.