Saturday, September 19, 2009

Ketiva ve-chatima tovah

I more often than not feel on the outside looking in. This could be because of what ever is going on inside my brain or I'm still the 'weird' kid you all remember from school. You know you all still remember that one kid who sat by themselves. Ate lunch alone, reading. Yep, that was me. Does that surprise any of you? lol. It shouldn't.
I know it's just me, but I've been seeing glimpses of a white wolf. He's there one second then gone. A few short months ago I would have just acknowledged him as a new spirit guide or power animal. But now, not so sure. My vision isn't as good as it used to be, and the headaches do make things blurry at times. So, not so sure anymore if he's really there for me to see, or if he's something else entirely. Nothing in fact. But I have caught a glimpse of him standing fully in the aisle at work, just for a half second, blink and he was gone. And in my own yard. Dogs seem to act like something is there though.

Tonight we came out of work, and there were BATS. Yes, real ones. We've never seen bats at work. Hell, I'd never seen a real bat anywhere. There were two of them and they were perched on a bench right outside of our store doors...just watching us. As cool as it was, it was very strange. Magical even.

I came home, pulled in and the wolf was standing in my yard. Then he was gone. I'm not sure what he symbolizes or is trying to convey but he has my attention. The bats...those are something new, and EVERYONE saw those. lol.

And Today is Rosh Hashanah. Which is the Hebrew New Year!

Ketiva ve-chatima tovah. translates “May You Be Written and Sealed (in the Book of Life) for a Good (coming) Year’ I extend my wishes to all!

I bring this up and wish you all the best because, well first, because it's the right thing to do and I have been having a really, REALLY difficult week. Bill collectors calling. No money. Bad health. Married daughter acting horrible. Just negativity from all sides crashing down on my head.

But according to my Good Friend Chris Yosef:
"The cosmic window opening over the next 2 days is for everyone! We can use it to literally correct and remove all the negativity we created. According to kabbalah, no matter HOW MANY negative actions we've committed, our true essence the creator within, Never becomes diminished! At Rosh Hashanah we reconnect both to our origin as individuals and also to the origin of humankind, We are literally born anew! Along with doubt another of our negative qualities is the ability to settle. We get ourselves in a difficult situation, and we get use to it. It's kind of like re-arranging the deck chairs on the Titanic. The boat is sinking but we try to make the chairs look nicer. We settle. The truth is we have unlimited potential so we should not be comfortable with anything but unlimited results!" He's so wise. lol.

So, you see, I'm still the weird kid. The outsider who says and reveals way too much and gets the eye roll I'm sure. But now I have no problem eating my lunch alone, reading my book. Maybe I'll whistle and my new white wolf friend will come and sit with me.

If anyone has any inside thoughts as to what the message might be they are bringing. Feel free to comment. Comfort perhaps. A sign that they haven't left. Or something entirely different. I don't know at this point.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Blood work

I have half my tests results back. The blood work and liver functions are all normal. Still waiting on the EEG though.

Dreaming cats. Not dreaming OF cats.

Tonight the cat was sleeping on my bed. Now, I know dogs dream, I've seen mine dreaming of running, twitching, whining. But cats? honestly, I've never thought about it. But she was sleeping. No twitching, no whiskers moving, not a tense muscle when all of a sudden she went 'MEOW. MEOW" I looked over at her and she was dead sound asleep. She was talking or better yet meowing in her sleep. LOL. It was so funny. Just thought I'd share.

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

I'm back!

It's been a long time since I posted, I know, BAD BLOGGER!
Summer came and summer went! the fairs came and went, kids went back to school.
Megan is full time, she is taking her coding classes now. She says she likes those, but the customer service class is boring and a pain in the ass. lol. Then sometime either this year she will take her phlebotomy classes.

Patrick graduated high school and is now taking his EMT classes through the fire dept. I still think at some point he'll take this training into the service.

Probably a good thing that two of my three kids are going into the health field. For myself I go on wed for an extended two hour EEG at Loyola Hospital. I have swelling on the left side of my brain, with no reason for it at this point. But then again, I just found this out when I changed Neurologists. The first one NEVER told me the results of the EEG from last January. Don't you think that at some point he would or should have taken a second one to see if the swelling had increased or decreased? Putz.

My oldest is now 5 1/2 months pregnant and isn't as much a mom zilla as she was, but she is still bitchy. I honestly don't think I was ever that bad with my three. LOL. I even asked my husband if I was that crazy?
She's having a GIRL. Can't wait to meet her. But I would have bet money on a boy. And I'm still wondering if 'he' is just hiding it. Lol.

I promise to post more and more often. I swear!