Thursday, April 23, 2009


I was talking with someone today about I.M.L and they asked if I had ever played? A simple question. But there are so many different ways to answer that one little question.

Yes, I played. Or a better answer should probably be, I dabbled. Lol. About a hundred years and several lifetimes ago.
My first boyfriend. The one whom I gave my V card to was also was my first boy. Didn’t know it at the time. But he was.
I’ve wondered over the years what exactly what all his different purposes were in my life. Yes, he opened my eyes to ‘play’. I certainly had my own ideas, but had never acted on them. We were both 17 when we began. And I was a intercourse virgin for the first two years of our being together. He said he was, and I believe that yes he was in the sense that he was a virgin with girls.
But, he more than a little experienced in butt play. What did I know? I knew NOTHING about what guys wanted in that area. But, damn when I decided to let him teach me, I was fast learner. Lol. It didn’t take long for him to let me take the lead. And I ran with it. For the first two years, he and I tried just about everything, except intercourse. He wasn’t really interested, and I wasn’t ready. Lol. Funny, I was beating him, I was tying him up, and using a strap on…but I wasn’t ready…LOL. I blush even writing that.
Two years in, we switched. He topped and I bottomed. Still, had no idea that there were even words or a culture for what we were doing. Two suburban kids both still living at home. But, that never stopped us. Where there is a will, there is a place and a scene I guess for two horny twenty somethings I guess.
I didn’t mind being the bottom, but he really wasn’t happy topping. And by this point, he was ready for a more vanilla relationship he told me. My kinky little heart was broke.
I saw him now and then. He would drunk call a few times a year. But for the most part I didn’t see him anymore for years.
…I mean years. I too moved into the more spiritual side of myself, learning about what made me me. Learning to hear my Spirit guides, communing with ghosts and just settling into my own skin I suppose.
Some years later I ran into him at some street fair with my kids, with his….boyfriend, that wasn't a big surprise. He did introduce us. But not as his ex girl friend, not his first, or his ex mistress, or what ever I was. The boyfriend kept looking at me strangely, probably trying to read the looks on our faces. I so wanted to ask if he still liked to be tied up? But he looked happy, and married and I just couldn't do it. I did wish him well and I meant it.

1 comment:

Jodie said...

Ummm....yeah. I already knew all that but seeing it written down made it even stranger. Thankfully, most of my old boyfriends really, really liked girl parts. R though...I think he'd go either way. Which would be fine if he wasn't a freakin' psychopath. Be grateful you never met up with him. Wish I hadn't.